Ed, who was visiting my roommate, asks, “Do you want to get laid tonight?”
“What’s she look like?” I respond with a question.
“Does is matter? Do you or don’t you?”
After pondering, I ask, “Where are you going with this?”
I had only known Ed for a few days, and we hadn’t talked much. As it turned out, Ed had a girlfriend, Fifi, who had a girlfriend, Alicia, who had a husband, but that is for later.
OK, so I was twenty, and it was late summer 1982. I had only recently moved from Boston to Los Angeles, and I had no plans. Christ! I didn’t even have a job yet. “Sure,” I said. “What’s the plan?”
And here is how it all played out: It was early in the afternoon and Ed drove us down to Redondo Beach to hook up with Fifi, his girlfriend. Fifi was a 30-something year old Nicaraguan single mother with two kids, both of whom were off to their grandmother’s for the weekend. It was a Saturday. This day was going to different than other days; I could feel it.
We put on our bathing suits and went down to the beach. This is where things started getting weird. Fifi and I came out of the water leaving Ed, and as we lay on our towels Fifi says, “I love your flat stomach. How would you like a blowjob?”
“Now?” I asked. “Here?” Fifi smiles evilly, and I continue, “This is a public beach.”
Just then, Ed shows up inquiring about our conversation. I’m feeling a bit sheepish to say the least. After all, it was his girlfriend.
“I asked him if he wants a blowjob, and he’s not sure,” she tells him.
Ed looks at me. “What’s the problem?” he asks.
Finally, I admit it, “I have never had a blowjob, and, besides, this is a public beach.”
As I expected the response was laughter and surprise and a chorus of, “What do you mean you haven’t ever had a blowjob?”
I was pretty speechless, and Fifi offered, “I have a better idea. Alicia gives great head. You’ll get a blowjob tonight after we pick her up.” I was relieved in some senses and apprehensive in other ways. All in all, I couldn’t wait.
Fifi was a bit wild. We went back into the water and Ed stayed behind to catch some rays. It wasn’t long before Fifi had her one-piece suit pulled down to reveal her C-D cup breasts begging me to fondle them and assuring me Ed wouldn’t mind. At the same time, I was wondering if this was true. Being a guy, I went for it and sucked on her salty nipples as indescretely as I could. It wasn’t much longer before she had her suit off all the way and she was asking me to finger her pussy while at the same time reaching down my swim suit to grab my cock. As portrayed in a certain Seinfeld episode, the water was cold. ‘Nuf said. Her pussy was cold but shaven entirely.
It was getting later, and we still had to pick up Alicia. We hurried back to Fifi’s to get dressed for the evening. Ed and Fifi dropped their suits once we walked through the door, and Fifi dropped to her knees and started sucking his cock. For those who might be interested, Ed was decidedly unendowed in length: three maybe four inches; but he seemed as thick as a Pepsi can—well, almost. He was build like a pony can. He came. She swallowed, wiped her mouth, and they both snorted some H. It wasn’t her first of the day. I didn’t realise it at the time, but my company, including the one we were about to pick up were big into the Heroin. (I always had a way of attracting Heroin Girls.) Fifi put on a shirt, a short skirt and pumps—nothing more—, and off we went.
Ed was driving and Fifi was riding shotgun, I was in the backseat. We arrived at Alicia’s in Downey. She was a natural blonde, I think—thin, a nice B bup, mid-twenties, married to a lawyer, Porche in the driveway.The husband was not coming. Alicia was having a “girls’ night out” with Fifi. I found out it was a regular occurrence.
Alicia, too, was wearing a dress with pumps, but she was wearing pantyhose. I am not sure why she bothered, the car wasn’t even moving yet, and they were around her knees; Fifi was reaching back from the front seat fingering her. Alicia leaned over and started kissing me, grabbing hold of my hand and bringing it to her breast. I didn’t need any further signal. We groped each other until she came.
When we arrived at the Roxy for a Plimsouls show, the night had barely started. Ed and I mostly wanted as Alicia and Fifi just grinded each other, ass to pussy and pussy to pussy. They had many admirers, especially when Alicia reciprocated Fifi’s gift on the way in. We must have stayed for about an hour when we decided we wanted to move to a more private setting—or so I thought.
Ed was discussing something with the girls. I heard him saying no. In the end, the girls won. We were going to go to the A-Frame. For those not in the know—and I wasn’t—, the A-Frame was swingers hang out in Hollywood Hills. Evidently, it cost $50 a person to get in, but the girls had a deal that if they had been there on Friday night, Saturday was free. I wasn’t sure what to make of it, but the girls had been there the night before, so they didn’t have to pay anything.
This was not a clothing-optional faire. Once inside, we removed our clothes and put them where we could retrieve them. A magician was performing a magic show with some pretty young thing. It was all such a blur, I don’t even remember what he did, but I think I was impressed. When he was finished, it was time for the night to really take off. To the west, there were two rooms each having an entrance leading to a porch with a large hot tub. The northern room had some lounging sofas and TVs, while the southern room had some snacky food and condoms.
My night turned out to be fairly uneventful, though I witnessed quite a bit. We all went into the northern room, and Fifi broke the news to Alicia that I had never gotten a blowjob. After the typical surprise, Alicia wasted no time. I lay down on a sofa, and she eagerly started sucking my cock. It took me a little while to get my wits about me—euphemism for getting an erection—, but once she nestled her shaven pussy in my face, I was good to go. (That works every time.) The audience was a little unnerving, but I got over it—and eventually, I got off. It took a while—certainly much longer than I was used to. So much for safe sex, but this was the early 80s. AIDS was just a “gay” thing in those days, or so we were told. She didn’t even wait to get off. There it was: my first blowjob. After I came, she was off to the races. I didn’t even see her again until we were leaving. I lost track of Ed as well. Who I did see was Fifi. She and I hopped into the hot tub. Not wanting to make a long story too long, I watched her get fucked at least a dozen times, suck as many cocks, and take half a dozen in the ass. Man, was I naive. Hey! At least I had my first blowjob under my belt—as it were.
Well, the night was about over, and we had to drive the girls back to Fifi’s. The main discussion was recounting the events of the evening and turned to how I enjoyed my blowjob. Alicia called her husband and told him she was wasted, so she was going to stay at Fifi’s place. It must have been about 3 AM when we got to her place, and I thought the night was over. No so. Once we got inside, I was given some blankets and told to find a spot. I did: on the living room floor. Fifi and Alicia found a spot together on the sofa in a traditional sixty-nine. I remember thinking that I wasn’t sure that eating out a chick that had but just so well-fucked was a great idea. I, myself, would have skipped that invitation.
Ed wasn’t done either. Fifi was on top. He just came up behind her and started fucking her. After just a few strokes, he plunged his cock into her ass. Despite his girth, she had no problem taking him. He came. They came. It was time for bed.
The next morning, which came all too quickly, I was greeted by Fifi who asked if I wanted another blowjob—this time from her. She was already playing with my cock, which was sporting morning wood anyway. Well, when I say ask, she didn’t wait for a response, she just went for it. I am not usually a morning sex person—or a morning person in general—, but this is certainly a nice way to start the day. I came. She left. Ed came. In what seemed like no time, it was time to go. Ed and I dropped Alicia off on the way home, and it was over. Ed stayed a few more weeks, and I never met him or the girls again, but it was one of those experiences to write home about—or here anyway.