My Favourite Life

February 1, 2007

Homeland Security, Dildos, and the Combat Zone

Filed under: Anal Sex,Blowjobs,cunnilingus,oral sex,Sex — myfavouritelife @ 6:00 am

As an early search term of the week, how can you carry a dildo on airplane luggage, I was reminded of the time I was stopped at the aeroport with sundry sexual toys: dildos, handcuffs, whatever. This was in the days before the Homeland Security Nazis rules the place, so it was no big deal. To tell you the truth, I don’t even remember what happened, except they took my cuffs. Whatever.

I am not sure under most situations someone would consider a dildo to be a weapon, though I have seen some double-dongs that would make good clubs, which in turn reminds me of the time I was wondering around in the Combat Zone (Washington Street) in Boston and I ran into two chicks giggling like schoolgirls, carrying this—had to be—two-foot double-headed dildo. I can only imagine where that was going to end up—probably a gag-gift (no pun intended), but don’t ruin my fantasy. Speaking of the Combat Zone—hey, I went to school near there. Give me a break—, another time my wife and I were shopping—alright, so I wasn’t going to school on this particular day—, and we ran into a mutual friend—someone who one wouldn’t expect to see there, and more importantly wouldn’t have wanted to be seen there. Oops!

This friend was a microbiologist who taught at some unnamed Boston university—but not Boston University. Later, we were talking about the change meeting, and the topic turned to anal sex. Well, this guy was decidedly not into anal sex. I guess when you are into microbiology, you consider the small things. He wasn’t into oral sex for the same reasons. Germs.

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