A weekend with no sex. Not good. While I like surprises, I guess there are good and bad surprises.
So I say I like surprises, but, besides good and bad, surprises come in two forms: ones with anticipation and spontaneous ones. Sometimes there is a temporal element. Obviously, at the moment you know something new, you are surprised. It has always irked me, for example, when a couple says they don’t want to know the sex of their forthcoming child because they want to be surprised. As it turns out, once they find out—irrespective of when—they will have been surprised.
Here’s an example. Sometimes my wife will do something to surprise me. She might shave her pussy, or do anal, or something else. But, like the couple that wants to wait, I would prefer that it seem more spontaneous—at least to me. What am I talking about? Here are two examples.
Example 1(a): Usually when she shaves, she tells me right away, “I shaved my pussy.” And so I have the benefit of anticipating her shaven surprise. The problem here is that sometimes life gets in the way, and when push comes to shove, perhaps the evening doesn’t go quite as planned and the sex part falls through. This just leads to disappointment and possibly resentment.
Example 1(b): Instead of telling me immediately, she waits until we are having sex. If I see her undressing, I might notice she is freshly shaven. Even better would be if she were under the sheets and I found out by feeling her pussy or when I went down on her. I think trading of the anticipation for the spontaneity would make all the difference. Maybe it’s just me.
Example 2(a): When it comes to anal sex, the same thing is true, the best laid plans can go awry. While it might be nice to know she will be in the mood (which can always change at a moment’s notice anyway).
Example 2(b): I would rather she just prepares herself without telling me. In this case the sexual encounter would go something like this. Sex would start as it usually does for us: a back rub for her, and then I go down on her. After that, she might mention she is in the mood for doggy-style. Once we get started, she might ask me to play with her ass, to insert a finger or two. After a while, she could surprise me and ask me to fuck her in the ass.
This almost happened a few weeks ago, as I mentioned previously. The difference then was that we had just fucked. I was playing with her ass and wanted to screw it, but she said she wasn’t in the mood. After I came, she said then she was in the mood. I was already spent, so the surprise was on me. We did manage, but it didn’t go quite as planned.
My point is I don’t want to know about the surprise. I just want it to happen. The next time my wife does down on me I would be thrilled if she just kept on going until she was doing deepthroat. No forewarning, just the activity.