My Favourite Life

November 15, 2007

Sexual Suggestion and Coercion

I can’t count the number of search entries where (obviously males) want to answer questions like these:

  • How can I get my wife/girlfriend to
    • shave her pubic hair?
    • receive anal sex?
    • to swallow?
    • do deepthroat?

And the list goes on.

Let me just start with one word: communication. You need to ask. You need to have open dialogue. You need to let her know why you want these things. You need to reassure her. Don’t coerce her. Don’t threaten her. Not everybody is into these things. Perhaps she isn’t. Perhaps you are with an incompatible partner.

If after you have asked and stated your position and she is not interested, you should be asking her why. This should be a point of discussion. She could have any number of reasons. Some will be rational, and some will be pathological. In the end, you will need to come to an agreement. If these things (or anything) is really important to you and she is unwilling to meet you in the middle, you may need to look elsewhere. Keep in mind, though, there may be things she wants you to change or do as well.


  1. thank you for making the world a better place, one sex blog at a time!

    Comment by Miss Tender — November 16, 2007 @ 1:12 pm | Reply

  2. We just found you tracking back a similar google search hit that came to us. “How can I get my wife to enjoy fellatio” was the one that found us this time. Oddly our little blog is google’s favorite search return out of 120,000 possible matches.

    Kind of funny because I (the Geek) have no advice to offer. What I did was marry a chick that liked the feel and taste of cock in her mouth. Not very helpful advice for those post-nuptial.

    I do like what your advice is on this, though, talk about it find out why she doesn’t enjoy it. The Fellatrix has a great article called “negotiating a Blowjob” on her site. The important thing is not to wheedle, not to pressure, not to spoil the beauty of the acts that she does enjoy by making sex some kind of chore or duty. NOt every one is blessed with my wife’s lack-a-gag, or for that matter with a wife like mine.

    Comment by The Fellatio Artist & The Geek — January 12, 2008 @ 1:19 pm | Reply

  3. Thanks. I’ve added you to my blogroll.

    Comment by myfavouritelife — January 14, 2008 @ 8:22 am | Reply

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