My Favourite Life

December 18, 2007

Search Terms of the Week: Anal Sex

Filed under: Anal Sex,Sex — myfavouritelife @ 5:50 am
Tags: , , , ,

I decided to look through the last week of search strings and focus on a topic instead of just a single phrase. The topic is anal sex. Here are some representative questions:

  1. anal intercourse for beginners
  2. is a woman’s ass tighter than pussy
  3. what can I do so anal sex wont hurt me?
  4. dangers of anal sex with female
  5. anal sex gone wrong
  6. best position for first anal
  7. “face down” anal
  8. anal sex when she wants it and he doesnt
  9. what works good to numb for anal sex
  10. ok for guy to cum while anal intercourse
  11. How to Get my wife to cum from Anal Sex?
  12. how do pornstars clean ass
  13. anal sex makes me feel dirty
  14. what will receiving anal sex feel like

Most of these issues are addressed in my Anal Sex 101 entry, but I will re-address some of them here anyway. There you can read about (1) anal intercourse for beginners.

(2) Is a woman’s ass tighter than pussy? This is a trick question: yes and no. Besides, it can depend on the woman. In my experience, it starts out much tighter and the longer you fuck it, the looser it gets. I have to admit, I have been with women who have loose pussies. But even this changes. Even my wife—who has a tight pussyat times has a loose pussy. personally, I enjoy the variety. In any case, to summarise: it starts out tighter and gets looser. The next time you fuck it, it will be tight again, and the same thing happens. She won’t just get a loose ass from ass fucking. I know many women worry about this.

(3) What can I do so anal sex wont hurt me? I talk about this at length in my Anal Sex 101 entry, but to summarise, use lots of lube and take it slow. If your guy is hung like a 2-litre bottle, I am not certain even this applies, but I have seen a woman take a cock the size of a Pepsi can painlessly, but she was experienced.

(4) dangers of anal sex with female and (5) anal sex gone wrong may be somewhat related. The entry I have on this is somewhat of a joke. Of course if you are too fast or too rough, you can experience tearing, but this is true for vaginal sex, too. The main difference is that a vagina self-lubricates, while an ass doesn’t. Refer to the lube response above.

What is the (6) best position for first anal? This is really up to her. I don’t believe there is a best position, save to say it is the one that allows her to control the pace. Many experts recommend him on his back and her on top. That might work well on paper, but—for one opinion in particular—my wife hates that position. She says she feels she is impaling herself. She prefers to be on her back—Old School Missionary (or is the New School? Anyway, let her decide. If she is the one asking, I would recommend good old doggie-style, on her knees. It makes for a perfect target, and she can easily play with her clit, too.

Speaking of positions, what about (7) “face down” anal? My wife’s favourite position is face down with a pillow or two to lift her ass up for better access. I have to admit I like it, too.

What about (8) anal sex when she wants it and he doesn’t? I am sure most guys into anal are asking themselves where this woman lives. The funny thing, though, is that I knew a woman just like this. Her husband refused to give her anal. She begged. He said it was disgusting and gay. She got it elsewhere. Eventually she got it from me. When she asked for a divorce, this was among the reasons. he said he would agree to do it, but it was too little, too late.

Anyway, sex should always be consensual. Communication can help, but there are some mindsets you cannot change. The more usual question is more like how can he get anal sex when he wants it and she doesn’t? The answer is the same. Perhaps you are just sexually incompatible. You need to look at your relationship as a whole and measure how important this is against the rest of your relationship.

(9) What works good to numb for anal sex? Many things, but don’t do it. You need to be aware of what he is doing down there. If it hurts, you are doing it wrong. Go slower, or use more lube. Period—well, save for the Pepsi can issue. The other problem is you may not be numbing the right parts. You may well numb your sphincter, but you will still feel pressure deeper than that. Besides, if he isn’t wearing a condom, he will get numb, too. So it may take him two or three times longer to cum. If he is wearing a condom, it will likely take him longer, too, and condoms tend to dry you out, so even more lube is necessary. If you really insist against my better judgment that you need to numb your ass, Ora-gel or some numbing stuff used for teething will do fine.

Is is (10) ok for [a] guy to cum while [having] anal intercourse? STDs aside, there should be no problem cunmming in her ass.

(11) How to Get my wife to cum from Anal Sex? Find her clit. Stimulate it. Doh!

(12) How do pornstars clean ass? Likely, they take an enema. A tap water a couple of hours—to allow time for the water to drain—works wonders.

(13) Anal sex makes me feel dirty. OK. Physically or mentally. If you mean physically, which I doubt, see the response to number 12. Otherwise, as with my response to number 8, it is difficult to get rid of programming and repression. Do you otherwise enjoy it? I know women like this. It feels good, but the associate it with negative things. you could see a therapist, but you will likely get a different response depending on the therapist. One may say get over it, while another might say you are right to feel this way. You just need to look at it in terms of you and yuor relationship.

Finally, (14) What will receiving anal sex feel like? This, of course, depends on many factors including your mental state, your relationship, how prepared you are, and how careful you are. Many women (dare I say, people) enjoy it. Many do not. I have to say that many do not for reasons outside of the actual experience—or perhaps a bad experience—, but my advice is to try it. But first, read my main post on Anal Sex 101.

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